Growing up I learned how to be happy from several sources. But, one of the most memorable was going to school. I absolutely adored going to school every morning.
Yes school had it’s challenges — I struggled with social acceptance, and I maintained only a tight knit group of friends.
But I was happy – and that happiness stemmed from the fact that I genuinely loved to learn. Curiosity was my hobby. Plus I was a people pleaser, which equated to a winning combination for becoming an honor roll student. I was never the brightest in my class, but I worked hard to master what was put in front of me because I wanted to make my teachers and family proud.
As I grew up there was never any question over if I would go to college. It was understood that I WAS going.
And that was fine by me.
College was a whole new world of learning to explore. And college was where my love of school and learning translated into studying to become an elementary school teacher after graduation.
I wanted to show the next generation of kids how to be happy when they were at school too.
Push the fast forward button quite a few years, a few jobs, and a few life transitions into the future and I’ve realized that the real challenge isn’t teaching kids how to be happy.
Children are the perfect role models of what it means to be curious and carefree.
The real challenge is seeking our own personal happiness as a an adult, discovering how to be happy in our day to day doesn’t come as naturally as it used to — especially after becoming a mom.
Once we leave the world of school there’s so much less tangible positive feedback and validation that we’re on the right track in our daily life. Last time I checked my Calmer doesn’t dole out A+’s, high fives, or stickers when:
- I cook a winning new recipe
- put together a bookshelf from Ikea all by myself
- hand sew a new hem in my pants
- Do 5 loads of laundey in a day
(wouldn’t that be amazing though!)
Once you’re a mom you are not only responsible for instilling happiness in your children, but you’re responsible for instilling it in yourself too.
If you’re in need of a few tips for how to be happy in your day-to-day, here’s 3 ideas to try:
Learn Something New
I recently listened to a podcast interview with researcher Vanessa Van Edwards who explores the ‘Science of People’ and most recently has been diving into the topic of happiness.
As a lover of learning, something in her research stuck with me. She suggests that in lieu of a bucket list, we create a ‘LEARNING LIST’. That list contains all of the things we’d love to learn in our lifetime whether it be a creative hobby like photography or knitting, an activity like yoga or ice skating, or a topic like gluten free living.
Find A Mentor / Community / Village
I’ve had an ongoing life / business coach for 4+ years now. Someone encouraging me to do more, be more, and reach greater levels of fulfillment in my life. I also have a village of close friends who I don’t see everyday but I know would do anything for me in a pinch.
Those people didn’t just appear in my life. I had to work at cultivating the mentors, friend, and community of people that make up my trusted village.
Having a network of support has made such a deep impact in my own life that it’s now my life’s work to mentor other women living a creative life and finding their identity beyond mom.
Prioritize Self-Care
The first thing I ask when I find myself or someone else struggling with happiness is, “When was the last time you did something for YOU?” Even the smallest amount of time can make an impact. Take 10 minutes to take a bubble bath, read a book, talk a walk around the block, snap some photos.
Then pull out a calendar put YOU on the calendar. Your self care doesn’t have to be anything grandiose, or expensive, or take a long time. But putting it on a calendar will set the tone that it is a priority in your life.
If you’re looking for a bit more support with how to find happiness in your daily life as a mom, I’d love to be your mentor. Recapture Time is a completely FREE email class that will help you define your learning list, feel supported, and prioritize your self-care. Click the image below to start class NOW.
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