I cringe every time I share this, but I spent much of 2011 and 2012 incredibly lonely.
Most of the close friends I admit that too laugh or look incredibly shocked or skeptical when they hear me speak this truth. But, it’s one I’ve felt in the depths of my soul.
But but, they cry: you have so many friends (859 on Facebook to be exact). You meet people so easily. You’re always going out for dinner. Or coffee. You get up in front of rooms of people and share yourself with them.
It’s true. I do meet people easily.
As an ambivert (straddling the line between extrovert and introvert) I have moments where teaching and meeting and connecting with rooms of people absolutely energizes me. And then I have those moments where I just want to sit with a cup of coffee in my office alone and write for hours what’s weighing on my soul.
But that doesn’t mean I make and keep meaningful friendships easily.
It’s hard work. A few years ago a close college friend posted this New York Times article about the difficulty of making friends after 30 and it hit really close to home. 
I entered my 30s by becoming a mom, building a business, and moving to a new town. Every play date with my daughter felt like a blind date. Every attempt to connect with old friends led to schedule challenges that come with raising small children. Every evening at home felt like an opportunity to move my business forward instead of making an effort to connect friends, old and new.
These big life shifts didn’t really change who I am internally, but they did realign my priorities and my goals. And I found not everyone I met was interested in deep conversations about mommy guilt, beautiful photography, and business growth.
Not to mention the time to connect regularly with all the true friends I still loved from high school, college, and my teaching job just wasn’t present, especially while I was still holding down my day job last year too.
The sad truth however, is how oftentimes we create what we most need, and as I created my classes I was in a place where I felt quite alone and in need of community myself.
When you come here to learn with me, you know that you’re going to gain some essential photography tips and leave your experience motivated and inspired. But one thing many of my students don’t realize how they’re going to gain a community of new friends from around the world too.
I didn’t ever really intend for it to be that way.
But it fills my heart with so much joy to know that’s what happens when I bring people together. Creating lasting bonds of friendship and camaraderie.
I thrive on building communities because when I turned 30 I so longed to connect with ‘my people’. And apparently when I began to build what I so longed for — people I LOVED, my people, started arriving.
It brings me the greatest joy to watch my students gain new friends and connect in a deep way with each other online.
Because I’m guessing as ‘my people’ they probably feel a bit of the loneliness I’ve experienced.
Fortunately, when I met this girl in 2012 as a student in a new online class, my own pattern of loneliness started to shift.
Megan and I met in an intense business and marketing course and immediately clicked. She’s 100% my soul sister in motherhood, life, and business. Only downer is that she lives on the opposite coast.
We met in person for the first time last summer at a work conference, and I flew out to visit her a 2nd time this fall.
During our many ‘car calls’ as we shuttled around kiddos and through those few in person meet ups we’ve had several conversations over this challenge of seeking balance and finding connection as moms growing business dreams.
We firmly believe that moms can fall into this trap of loneliness way too easily as we neglect our self-care for the good of our families (and our businesses).
But we also know, what a small tight-knit community of like minded moms can do to lift us up to greater levels of self-awareness, and growth than we ever imagined possible.
So, we started a side project that embraced our ideals.
The Well Balanced Mama was born to bring moms together who are longing for a community and are feeling the challenges of building business dreams while raising kids.
Over on our site, we’ve conducted video interviews with mom owned businesses who are very openly talking about the struggles and triumphs they experienced in striking a balance between motherhood and business.
I’ve also got a retreat coming up as well that tie in these ideals of combating the loneliness and lack of purpose that can come sneaking in when we become moms.
The Resonate Retreat aims to build a tight-knit community of like-minded moms, dedicating time for kid-free life and/or business planning and goal setting, that will leave you feeling more balanced and ready to take on the world.
The next retreat will take place August 7-9th 2015 in Bluemont, VA.
Each retreat is limited to 10 women.
It’s close enough to the hustle and bustle of DC to make it easy for out of town travelers to make it, yet far enough away from the city to feel like a scenic getaway.
The more and more I’ve made an effort to seek balance, make meaningful connections, and dedicate time to my self-care, the more balanced and less lonely I’ve become.
It’s my wish that somewhere along the way I can help you do the same.